Here’s a deleted scene I just made up that fits into Smite Me, Oh Dark One (which, by the way, is currently free on Amazon). In this scene, the gods discuss whether Acerbus is really trying to destroy the world:
The heavens shimmered like a tree coated in frozen rain. Lux, Thundorious, Buti’col, and Fromdon sat around the universe, each sipping from a glass of heavenly wine. “Brothers,” said Lux, “What do you say of Acerbus’ diligence? I fear he has been quite lax in his mission. Do any of you recall how long ago we bid him smite all life?”
Buti’Col was the only god capable of calculating time on the world below; she alone was able to think in terms of human lifespans, whereas the other gods had difficulty resolving any period of time smaller than a millennium. She counted on her fingers and muttered for a bit, until finally declaring, “Approximately 19 generations, which is roughly 800 years.”
Lux nodded. “Is that a lot?”
“Long enough for the mighty coconut tree to bear fruit and wither,” said Fromdon, God of Coconuts.
Lux scratched his chin. “Thundorious, when you saw fit to smite the bird-people, how long did it take you?”
Thundorious, God of Inclement Weather, wrung his hands together and mountains shook on the world below. “The smiting was nigh-instantaneous. On the first day, I sent a mighty hurricane to dash their bodies against the mountainside. On the second, I sent forth a lightning storm of unspeakable proportions to lay waste to every edifice constructed by their avian fingers. By the end of the third night, even their wails of despair had gone silent.”
The other gods gave a small applause at an uplifting story well told. All of them except Lux. “And yet Acerbus has lingered there for 800 years, and has yet to administrate a single smiting.”
Fromdon cleared his throat and said, “Not per se, but he has talked about it a lot.”
“Oh yes,” added Buti’col, “There’s one family in particular that he frequently visits and entertains with some highly graphic doomsaying.”
“Mayhaps he’s merely building suspense,” said Thundorious. “I, for one, like to ensure that thunder always precedes lightning, such that people have ample opportunity to tremble in the face of the coming storm.”
“Yes,” said Buti’col, her eyes and smile growing equally wide, “And when I designed certain mating rituals, I ensured that the—and the— “ She made a few very obscene gestures. “It’s easier to explain with two people.”
Fromdon rubbed the back of his neck and added, “And I designed coconuts to be nearly impenetrable, so that a frog-man must be nearly dying of thirst before he can muster the strength to crack one open and suck out the delicious milk.”
Lux raised his hands imperiously, and the other gods fell silent. “Nonetheless, it remains that Acerbus has been lazy for what I assume is a very long time by terrestrial standards.” He waited for affirmation from Buti’col before he continued. “A very long time indeed. We must expedite the process. Buti’col, you and I shall bolster the alliance between Elves and Man, and wage a fresh war upon the goblins. Perhaps if Acerbus witnesses a proper smiting, it will inspire him to fulfill his duty.”
“As you desire,” said Buti’col. She and Lux turned their attention to the universe in the center of the room. Fromdon and Thundorious filed out. Perplexga, Goddess of Things That Make No Sense, walked backwards through the room wearing a highway as a hat.
